HIGHER THINKING BLOG

Mind and Heart By Andrea Leigh Capuyan

Prayer for a Mind and Heart Surrendered

“Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men.  And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” – Philippians 2:5 – 11, ESV

Lord, make me less. Not less than. I do not seek false humility. This is not an inferiority complex. Because my choices matter I am not insignificant. Because I am a display of Your splendor I am not invisible. I do not want to be less than what You’ve called me to be – an image-bearer. And that identity is enough for me. I want “image-bearer” to be the only mantle I seek – nothing more. Expose all my desires, which have become demands, which inflate my ego, which leaves me wanting more. I do not wish to trade on the weight of my name – make me less.

Lord, make me small. You set aside a throne and became a baby – helpless and trusting. You set aside adoration, worship, and fame. You became a man of no reputation. Make me like You. Make me small – a little child in need of Your care – swaddled in Your provision – cradled in Your arms – in need of Your love. Make me fully dependent and fully open to You. Teach me to be utterly vulnerable before You – make me small.

Lord, restrain me. Shut my mouth. Open my eyes. Incline my ears. Attune my heart. Still my mind. Again, shut my mouth. Where my sight is skewed, clear my vision. Do not let my thoughts trap me in some dream world where I obsess in ‘what ifs’, ‘if only,’ and ‘maybe, when.’ Keep me in the boundaries of where You’ve placed me – in the here and now. I do not wish to rush ahead or lag behind – make my step be in step with You. Tether me to You – restrain me.

Lord, dismantle me. When I think I am not enough and fill my days in search of shiny baubles  – dismantle me. When the quest for ribbons and rewards to affirm my value consumes me – dismantle me. When I seek to be the radiant star – dismantle me. Expose all the cracks in this fragile jar of clay. Make me naked and unashamed before You. Undo all my masks which I use to hide from You and others. Remove all the distractions and make me whole – dismantle me.

Lord, empty me. Replace my hunger for attention with a thirst for surrender. I do not wish to fill the room as a demanding presence – wanting to be heard. I want to be one who waits – a listening soul. Put me in a narrow space – the less-traveled path. The deepest valley where my shoulders are pressed into the sharp,  rocky crags, rubbing against the hard places – nowhere to turn except to lean into Your protecting presence. Settled by the weight of Your right hand. I do not want to be full, satisfied, inflexible – rigid. Make me uncomfortable. Make my life thin, so You can pour me out – into the cracks of this broken world – the dark places where others fall – pour me there – empty me.

Lord, make me less. Make me small. Restrain me. Dismantle me. Empty me. Make me nothing, so You might be my all in all.

Lord, let it be to me, Your steward, according to Your Word. I give you a mind and heart surrendered to you.

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Andrea Leigh Capuyan, CCNL, CNAP, is the Executive Director of the Laurel Pregnancy Center in Laurel, Maryland. She is cares about leadership development and organizational culture within the small nonprofit ministry setting. She is passionate about encouraging fellow women in their roles as leaders. Defining our identity as a steward of God informs her perspective on everything – faith, leadership and spiritual transformation.

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